Recently I was there to exchange an air conditioner jimmy hat, aka an A/C cover. This is the plastic tarpaulin thingy you throw on it to protect it over the winter when you're done using A/C in the Fall. As an aside, I'm not sure why it's necessary to protect it from the snow when all summer long raccoon shit and rain beats down mercilessly into the guts of it, but that's a question for science, not me.
Canadian Tire stores are supermarket sized, so searching for a relatively obscure item can be something similar to what your average Hobbit experiences in any given Tolkien novel. Sure, there's signage indicating different departments, but narrowing it down is the challenge. Could be Home Comfort, could be Seasonal. If the latter, because it's nearly November, have A/C products been relegated to the warehouse? I approach one elderly employee nervously stacking boxes on a ladder, which is a surprise in itself since Canadian Tire stores are usually staffed by 17 year-old's who know less than me about home repairs.
He grunts the location to me, so I find my way to the myriad of shapes and sizes of A/C covers. The dimensions shown on each package vary wildly - some expressed in inches, some in millimetres, and some really dusty ones are expressed in latin. And, is it length by width by depth, or some other mind-bending permutation? I'm proud to say I achieved a mensa-level 68% in grade 13 relations and functions, so it was no surprise I ended up selecting the correct size.
Fuck all'yall waiting in line behind me. I'm posing for this stock photo. |
In reality, however, I know what's coming. She's playing Jedi mind tricks with me. Of course they'll exchange the goddamn fourteen dollar A/C cover. See, she's been trained to give me the gears for half a second, but ultimately give me what I want so I walk out of that store thinking: Golly Canadian Tire you guys are great! She even picked up the phone and left a voicemail for the manager indicating what she was doing, but in reality, I think the woman faked it.
It's not the first time a woman's faked it.
I am really enjoying your blog but.... please can you change the font / colour / background colour. The bold white on black is hard to read and makes me just give up halfway through.
ReplyDeleteThank you for your note Anonymous. I will have my crack team of web developers look into this right away - - in other words, me.
ReplyDeleteAppreciate the feedback.
-HG
Excellent! I bought a weight set from CT that I tried to return but they said too bad! I said it's not working I'm not getting skinnier and it was unopened and everything.
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